The Most Successful Leaders Are Unique

By Karina Hana-Meksem. PhD

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken -

 Oscar Wilde 

As human beings, we all are unique and initially have a particularity to look and act like nobody else. We have to stay true to ourselves and avoid succumbing to the temptation of being others
. Every day, this is a hard lesson to teach to ourselves and to our children as well. Last night, I tried to convince my 5 year-old daughter again that she is not allowed to wear nail polish at school, while other little girls in her class wear these beautiful fall colors.

Sadly, peer pressure starts very early. We all live in frantic societies, where the thought of being authentic to ourselves is devoured by pressure from our peers and the media, who dictate who we should be and what we should do to fit into these false societal molds. It is always easier to copy others, than to simply accept ourselves.

Authenticity is a rare and high-priced commodity; in fact, people have to fight fiercely to be who they truly are, because it might disturb these fabricated norms. This struggle is a mission of its own, that many of us dismiss for convenient reasons, and lack the time to really think about it. We simply give up our uniqueness to become another version of us that will comply and quickly be dissolved into the crowd.

True mental and physical characteristics of a leader matter 

 We should stop apologizing for who we are and what we believe in. Let's remember that one day, we were all born with unique characteristics, that made us unrepeatable. Physical characteristics are a deep part of who we really are, and an effective leader cannot ignore the emotional impact that their own physical appearance has.

In fact, research has shown that appearance is important in leadership. Your physical appearance, verbal expression, business etiquette, and online presence determine how you are truly perceived. However, the focus on each individual's uniqueness is often dismissed.

The key to success is not to copy others. As a matter of fact, we should really comprehend that we are not Mark Zuckenberg of Facebook and cannot adopt his casual leadership style, unless we are following our own creative style. We also should not build a very pushy, unintellectual, and scandalous Kardashian-type brand in order to think we are successful people. To tell the truth, the definition of success itself is very debatable. Is making money the definition of success? Is overdosed media exposure success? Certainly everybody is entitled to their own perception of success.

Indeed, success is multifaceted, and we have to understand that our image is a part of it. Our image is a precious asset that distinguishes us from others. A multitude of resources are available regarding the development of our mental skills that can help improve ourselves and our careers. We are so eager to develop new skills and competencies that we completely forget to develop our basic physical characteristics as well.

We should work on naturally developing our physical characteristics because we know that they also matter. Our internal identity should match our external image. We should put more focus on our smile, eye contact, and have a positive and energetic attitude. Looking healthy and fit are also fundamental aspects of success. These traits should be a true reflection of who we really are from the inside.

However, we all know that change does not happen overnight and building the real you day by day is an exciting adventure. Looking and being fit is not about following the trends on the magazines. On the contrary, it is finding your own pace as a unique individual to exercise. For instance, by lowering your stress level, you can feel good about yourself and be more confident.

The development of our physical characteristics is as important as our mental skills because they are part of who we really are as leaders. As we improve our intellectual skills, we have to work on our own physical aspects as well. Focusing on how we physically interact with people is fundamental. To be able to improve ourselves we have to accept ourselves the way we are. It is a personal journey that leads us to improve our self-presentation in an authentic way. As leaders, we need positive physical and mental characteristics that define us and lead us to success.

Success is naturally created by each of us in his/her own way; it should not be copied.